When I was growing up, my name, Sherryl Lin Frauenglass, came with a slew of interesting challenges. Frauenglass was difficult enough for people to spell, but add to that my mother’s unique spelling of both my first and middle names, and you have a recipe for much teasing and general confusion. I was a kid who desperately wanted to “belong”, so having an unusual name was a constant reminder that I was different from the mostly W.A.S.P. kids I grew up with. I so wanted to be a Kathy Smith or a Susan Jones!
As a young adult I began to realize that it was kind of cool to be different and I began to embrace my name. The women on my father’s side of my family took great pride in having a unique name and most of them retained Frauenglass when they married. Even my mother decided to keep Frauenglass as her last name when she and my father divorced.
When I married in my late 20’s, I chose to continue my family tradition and retain my maiden name. It wasn’t until a divorce and subsequent remarriage 18 years later, that I decided to take my husband’s name. At the time, I really wanted to honor Jim by sharing his last name, Haldy, but there were some practical reasons as well. I had lived with a difficult to spell and pronounce name for my entire life and I wanted to try on something shorter and easier to spell. Ironically, it turned out that Haldy does not ring clear when it’s spoken or read. I was constantly being addressed as Sherryl Hadley or Halsey or Holly! So much for simplifying!
A few years ago, as I was developing a media consulting and coaching business, I decided that I wanted something a little more unique and began to use my middle name. In my early 20’s an intuitive astrologer had said that I would be using Lin later in my life and I thought this must be the time she was talking about!
Most of my clients and newer friends knew me as Sherryl Lin and this was my “brand” as I began to develop a clientele. After a couple of years, something began to feel a little off about being Sherryl Lin. I was going through a deeply transformative time in my personal life and it was becoming clear that Sherryl Lin represented my ego TRYING to be something or someone, rather than me just being ME! I’m sure that my family and friends were a bit puzzled when they heard me using Sherryl Haldy again.
Over the past year, I have been in a period of contemplation, reassessment and redefinition of who I am. I began to recognize the voices of others that had taken over my life. I had let other people’s opinions of who I should be define me. I questioned myself daily. “Who am I without my mother’s opinions?” Who am I when I’m not being a mom?” “Who am I other than Jim’s wife.” “Who am I when no one is looking?” Slowly my true voice began to emerge.
From this authentic place, I realized that the name I had been given at birth, Sherryl Frauenglass, was my TRUE VOICE. I felt most at home with this name.
Sherryl = beloved, cherished
Frauenglass = woman glass
Beloved woman (reflected in the) glass THIS IS ME!
No comments:
Post a Comment