When my daughter was moving into her teen years, there were days when the morning ritual of figuring out what to wear to school would turn into tearful, angst-filled meltdowns. We decided to call these "F U Days", for "fat" and "ugly".
No matter how many times I would tell her how beautiful she was or how great those jeans looked on her, my words could not penetrate the wall of self-loathing she had built up in that moment. What my daughter really needed was acknowledgment that there were some days where she just wanted to wallow in whatever drama her mind had created.
Sometimes she would stomp around for a while and then leave the house still embodying the FU energy. Other days, we would end up laughing at how ridiculous it was that we could feel great about our bodies one day and the very next day think they were the ugliest thing in the world.
The biggest lesson I learned from this stage of raising a daughter, was the importance of giving feelings a place to be fully expressed so that they ultimately dissolve into the nothingness from which they came. When I resist and suppress feelings that I label "irrational", "unevolved" or in any way negative, I allow them to fester in some dark corner of my psyche.
Goddess says, "When you're having an F U DAY, give it your ALL and make it the best F U DAY that you can possibly imagine. Stomp around. Have a temper tantrum. Write a complaint letter to the universe. Then love yourself back to center."
No comments:
Post a Comment